ungrown

i am.
 
wait.
 
i realize i am a mere child at this thing.
and i'm trying to drive?
i am a pissant kiddie.
and i am so angry at this. i am red livid, motherfucker. eat that, Ladies. your theories are valid!
 
all you doctors and scientists, i stamp your theories valid!
 
i want to shoot you in the face, but i can't see your faces!
i'd like to cut your heart out, but i've already got one!
 
wait!
 
just let me stand in the frame of your bedroom door while you sleep and maybe dream of sharing time with me; it is okay i got this knife. your deep hissing breath will prevent me.
 
i am a child and i pretend!
 
'it's okay, we all do.'
 
yes, but i want it to die! ohoh oh!
 
this is poison, you are poisoning yourself if you look here anymore! but i am not going to stop baiting the trap! go ahead, be a martyr!
fuck your forgiveness. it only makes you feel better.
 
but i will do this!
 
there. i have cut a line in the top of my wrist. and i have separated the skin from the muscle. can you get in there now? i know you want to, and i just wanted to help. so crawl around. get under there.

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Very disturbing, i hope you are ok....f