
The Interactive Poetry Pages
Aha! Poetry
View poem without authors
Aha! Poetry Top Page
Poem Number 20739
The revolving five mailbox post
---~Cooker, Moscow Idaho
with new phonebooks and junk mail
---Cooker
that vital news remains unhaled
---~Cooker
sludge of contacts who want me dosed
---Cooker
The northernmost winds have here bailed
---Cooker
Stuff to greet any male desire
---Cooker
Who shall I touch to share this wealth
---Cooker
this sludge me, solitude on fire
---Cooker
watching you while here I dwell'th
---Cooker
~
---Anonymous
As suggested I spent some cash
---~Cooker
Only the guns held their value
---~Cooker
or helped restore my solitude.
---~Cooker
Her tapping knock not at all brash
---Anonymous
lost she sought my solicitude
---Anonymous
proven traffic cones mark my drive
---Anonymous
I sketched the way to highway eight
---Anonymous
tried coffee, cocoa and all that jive
---Anonymous
but cold fear and dark had made her late.
---Anonymous
She blew in, eventually, tied to a stake of her own making
---~~Cor~~
eager for the guttering flames of my mouth.
---~~Cor~~
I knew then her life was mine for the taking
---~~Cor~~
so I put torch to the pyre and headed due south.
---~~Cor~~
Commentary:
It's not much of a start but I hope someone can help by adding ome lines.
-------
Whew! almost have a creepy metaphor going here
-------
There is really nothing to destroy here by adding a line that doesn't rhyme, especially an interesting one. Errors are permitted on my solicitation for collaboration. ~Cooker
-------
Again I must qualify what I have said, many poems that do not even try to rhyme are superior to mine, that is to say not errors. I try to slagger them around too much anyway. Still.. sometimes working together an a thing like this works out. An idea that was way too small is opened for business, or something.
-------
I am foud out! ~Cooker
-------
Sorry about that...I tried to salvage the rhyme as best I could. Can this continue?
~~Cor~~
-------
I cannot recall enjoying a poem more. You have really lit the end. Is it angsty or is it fun? She must have had a checklist for men and realized he fit all the boxes. Or maybe it's some overwork tahiti thingy. Wow what fun. ~Cooker
Add to commentary
Unless specifically noted otherwise, copyrights for all lines entered belong to the authors only.
View poem without authors
Return to current poems in progress.
Completed Poems.
Aha! Poetry Top Page
Send a general comment to the web author, or view some of the comments left by others.
Thanks in advance for any feedback you can pass on.
Disruption report - Please choose this link to report any disruptive or offensive entries, or closing sprees, if they appear. Thank you.
Brought to you by Ann Cantelow.