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Poem Number 19291
Thunder overwhelmed the frightened sounds,
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Screams and sighs, when is car ran that red light,
Seconds passed and the wreck was upside down,
Destiny, without remorse, unleashed fate’s bite.
As he wondered, late that confusing night,
About is so called existence, trivial and trite,
Yielding to a myriad of demons, without a fight
He was unsure about the importance of life.
Time, now stood still yet it did not mattered,
Out his control, he wished for sights not seen,
and as he bleed on the car’s tan leather seats,
he recalled the type of person he had been.
His name could had been Joe, I never knew,
but it had no consequence, it didn’t matter,
he had a choice between right and wrong,
however, he clearly chose to live the latter.
He finally felt remorse and began sobbing,
when he thought about is kids and wife,
only seconds before he welcomed Death
He understood the importance of life.
Very sad tale...cem
wow... just..wow. *teyie
Line 2, line 6, is should read his?
But death betrayed him,
he wasnt born again
forevermore he would wonder
relivin his remorse and pain
facing some fake faith peddler
who spews out vague words in vain
reciting ancient text that's fodder
for preacher's mouth cannon lacking brain
This is not Hermestri. Hermestri never made such irregular errors and so many, i.e., letters left out, verbs in wrong tense. This is not Hermestri.
Mystery poet, I’m flattered. Although I did not write this piece, I still like it. I believe that by signing it on your own name you could still take credit for it. Would you like me to rewrite it? – “H”
Frightened voices, a mixture of screams and sighs,
beleaguered the storm’s thunder that summer night,
When, he drove his car into his own certain demise
as he cursed nature’s fickleness and that red light.
Time slowly stopped as our friend’s end drew near,
As quick thoughts of denial began changing into fear,
Destiny, without remorse, unleashed the ripper’s bite,
While, in the late evening, rain washed away his tears.
Mind is its own place and his was filled with fright,
Surrendering to a myriad of demons, unable to fight,
Whilst a collage of his life’s regrets flashed by
As he implored for forgiveness with all his might.
He bled copiously on the car’s tan-colored leather seats,
Red cells no longer pumped by his heart’s irregular beat,
Remaining alive, became a battle he could not win,
as death grew closer, in the summer’s night humid heat.
In the morning, all the newspapers singled out his name,
Our neighbor has died, ”Oh my God, Joe, such a shame”
And family and friends congregated to pay their respects,
Because in life we all have our fifteen minutes of fame.
Our tale’s lesson is simple; tragedy in our world is rife.
Joe left behind a cat, the mortgage, his little boys and wife,
Death does not believe in early warnings or goodbyes,
His family will eventually join him if there is an afterlife.
Mystery poet: I rewrote your poem since you signed with my name.
Hermestri or “H”
Why would you fake one of H's poems anyway. He is not that good!
anon, shut up and go home, if you have one! Patrol
Well done in the second poem, your perfection of every 1,2 & 4th line rhyming and the great improvement of phrasing in each stanza, is evidence of your talent. Well done Hermestri. Anon of many anons.
So I was right. This was not "H". "H", why did you feel the need to rewrite it? It was like (metaphor) a 300 lb man in a tutu doing a dance and then a dancer like Martha Graham (alive though-martha is deceased) redoing the who dance over. Like Sonny from the 2nd grade playing a violin solo followed by Isacc Perlman on the same solo. Why don't you sign your full name, "Hermestri". We who love your poetry will see the difference when an imposter takes over. I still say Hermestri that you sometimes sacrifice the thought to the rhyme, i.e., "name-shame". I am always so pleased to see a Hermestri poem on this site. As for "Patrol". Wow what a lousy name. It implies all the bad things that comp down on the creative and spontaneous. Such a person wants you to be afraid of him/her. go away Patrol. This is not your site. Trust me on this.
Previous one, your comment on Hermestri is amusing, creative and very effective. It is also derogatory towards a poet who admires Hermestri enough to spend time and effort to emulate "H". It also scorns "H" who appreciated it enough to re-write it for the fan.
So where do you fit in this little tight-kint mutual admiration group? Patrol (for sanity)
"Patrol" of many names, YOU appear to be a disrupter and trouble maker to this site, always butting in with some twisted opinion. ***You would be lost in not being able to snipe with your "self empowered" liberty of affliction, upon others here***. It seems likely you are the "poet" who imitated Hermestri, hence your above reaction, which otherwise could be classed as "busybody". The "imitation" was better than your usual standard, you excelled yourself with this imitating piece, but although not your fault --- Hermestri's is better. You are not doing him any favors using his name!!! Anonimuss
Actually, I enjoyed both versions of this story. The first one is great in its simplistic rhyme scheme, though a few typos, and the second was great in its more detailed and complex flow. Sad that the first one is proclaimed to be a fan of Hermestri, because this fellow(a) should have their own identity. It is clearly obvious that there is some budding talent to them that they should get credit for. I've been away from this site for two or three months. I really don't know the personalities behind some of the new names. I hope not to step on any toes with this comment. Lori S. Maynard
(above comment) Before my words are taken wrong, I meant that it was sad that someone would use someone else's signature when they have their own talent. Immitation is flattery, but when there are no faces to these screens, best to have your own alpha identity. I must admit, I am a big fan of Hermestri's work also. Lori S. Maynard
Hermestri, it is not that your writing is bad; in fact, I rather like it. Nevertheless, your pack of clowns gets tiring. All they do is bicker amongst each other, with known poets and with strangers. “H”, it may be best if you stay away for a while …
"H" do not listen to the last clown. Stay and write your nice thought provoking poetry. If Clown and them ilk can't stand your heat, THEY should exit your kitchen, NOT you! Stati
Herm is OK ...get off his back.
Hermestri, however baited, often chooses not to respond. I have been an admirer and commenter on his poems for a long time and I don't think he even acknowledges my comments. That's O.K. Maybe he's off chasing another vampire for another poem.
Patrol, this is from "Previous One". I did not write those ugly comments beneath yours. How do I fit in? Well, I'm no clown and I resent the stupid jerk who calls us clowns. Clearly and idiot. Probably the very one who suggested to "H" that his poems were not appropriate for this site and perhaps he should find another site. That made me so mad, I saw red. Now Mr. "Clearly Ignorant" calls us clowns and asks "H" to leave. Please, Mr. "only mean", you leave! One thing for sure Patrol, "H" always stirs up excitement and heated argument. Isn't that wonderful? Otherwise, wouldn't this site be boring at times? Great art stirs up imagination. And Patrol, no reason I commented on H and "H"-probably only to show myself that I can recognize Moazart from "Who did you say he was?"
First, I want to thank and acknowlege all of your comments and suggestions. Even if I sometimes don’t comment after your input, I want to assure you that constructive advice is always welcomed. I will sign all my poems with my full name again, no more abbreviations to avoid confusion. I want to remind the “mystery poet” that his work was well received by many readers here. I strongly suggest that you write with your own name. Finally, to the person who thinks that we are all clowns, I invite you to write a poem about it. – Hermestri
Hermestri, I owe you an apology. I was the one who imitated your style and signed your name. I wrote a few poems before but never got much attention from anyone. I guess I wanted to feel popular. You been super about it but now I am ashamed. Please accept my apologies. - A fan
That is a fake apology if I ever seen one. I wonder which one of te clowns wrote it? I guess we will never know ...
last one, what's the point of your comment? Just to have the last word? O.K., have it and go home! Patrol
No, you go home!!! Last word, Ha Ha.
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