2 haiku

Te
.
The path narrowing ...
Suddenly ankel-deep
In blueberries
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Wu Wei
.
Sea-cloud, rain-stream
Rising-blowing, falling-flowing
Going-going, nowhere-here
~
~
-- allan
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I like! Particularly #1... has a wonderful element of surprise. (btw, I prefer the huckleberries) -pen::)
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thanks penny ::) the haiku does spring from a walk in a forest a summer years ago, on the isle of Bornholm in the baltic sea. On this isle there's this place featuring the 'hills of paradise', and the 'hills of hell'. And because all the tourists wre rolled in in busses for the hills of P, we picked the hills of H. Which were wild and untrodden by human feet, and as as i wrote, we suddenly found ourselves in the largest patch of blueberries i've ever seen - i lean towards the blueB for the huckleB, they are the same botanically as i gather it so to speak eh ? - but blueB has that ring of melancholy to me which fitted the place, while huckleB, tastes too much of mark twain... maybe. - hugs, allan
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hi pen & allan...great to come by and see you two! ;)annie
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ahhh, I see allan. lol... different perspectives I suppose. blue berries are so obviously blue, for me, and the hucklberries seemed sad. tugged at my heart. different strokes for different folks. though like you, i would have chosen the hills of hell, rather than the hills of paradise. why take the easy path, eh? fine day to you. hugs - penny (hey annie, sent those addresses, hope you rec'd:)
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just a thought from this ole country boy--for what it's worth--but as i know it blueberries & huckleberries are not the same--huclkeberry is a wild berry darker in color--almost black--with more seeds--blueberry is a tame berry--simalar--maybe related but not the same--window watcher
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Ok- I give up.I need some hints from the"masters"--why don't I take to Haiku? Some is beautiful. I can go for tanka and cinquain but haiku rather scares me for some reason. Maybe I haven't reached that state of conciousness yetlol. Jane
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allen--forgot to say--i liked both poems--equally--each has their own character--but for some strange reason i have always liked the rain!--WW
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lol WW, in Denmark we've only got these small, wild blueberries
- that's Viccinium myrtillus to Linné -
but i'd expect them to be close to the size of baseballs
and nothing less than colour of deep purple heart in the us of a :)))
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I donno Jane - haiku is terse of course, like a glimpse, flash of truth
but when you're in that mood, - there's nothing to match that laser
Maybe some more training on tanka and cinquain :))
not either or of course - i always enjoyed your longer poems
-- allan