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Poem Number 6929

ask
elaborate goddess women
to lick sleepful
shadows
beneath cool, black, moon-like
pictures.**************By Becca*******Comments are welcome!*********
Commentary:
Becca, this is an effective poem. For me it conveys a message...as if in a personal ad. in a newspaper, *John, Liverpool, England.*
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Becca \\ You have a good idea here, with great imagery. To me, "elaborate" may be redundant, like a boulder in the road of a smooth line. I stretched my imagination about licking shadows; could'nt agoddess do something more esoteric. Also would not one goddess be enough? I write as a reader, not poet; and because you asked for an opinion. \\ Howie
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